It’s November. And while the leaves have begun to change colors and fall fast to the ground—you’re finding yourself quickly running to the nearest Starbucks, in desperate need of a venti triple shot Pumpkin Spice Latte.
Oh, not so fast. I’m necessarily not talking about you (even though you probably are wearing thermal leggings, Sperrys, and have a gold Starbucks Reward Card in your Longchamp bag).
I’m not judging you either, I promise.
I understand you. Pumpkin Spice Lattes are the hallmark of the white middle-class Autumn. They go hand-in-hand with Instagram selfies of leaf piles and nature walks in the woods. They are also delicious, even though they don’t have any real pumpkin in them and have been described as “artificial bullshit that represents what is essentially a void in your personal taste.”
Never has a white female been seen in public with a Pumpkin Spice Latte without someone else thinking something along the lines of the fact that she’s a “basic bitch”.
Basic Bitch defined by the Urban Dictionary: [a person who fulfills] all the stereotypes of your typical 22 year old white girl and absolutely nothing more.
And whether you just call someone a “white girl” or a “basic bitch,” this is about more than someone just judging you for the fact that you visit Starbucks when it’s PSL season.
It’s about the fact that women can’t go one day without being compared to the “basic bitch” trope by men, and sometimes, even other women.
Sometimes people joke about Pumpkin Spice Latte season, and all is fine and dandy.
But usually, it doesn’t work that way. PSLs, Sperrys, Longchamp bags, leggings, ballet flats are all things that can be used as “evidence” to reinforce the notion that there’s a certain type of woman that’s walking caricatures of the stereotype that characterizes us as shallow, materialistic, and easy consumers of the group-think mentality.
Think about it – there is nothing inherently wrong with Pumpkin Spice Lattes. Is there?
For men, nothing really rivals the type of disdain women face when they buy Pumpkin Spice Lattes (although you could try to make a case that the mockery of salmon shorts on men at elite universities is comparable).
So while you’re thinking about where you can go between classes to get some studying done and get some more caffeine in your blood, don’t feel guilty if a Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte seems like the answer to your woes.
Even though Starbucks is the epitome of capitalist culture, don’t blame yourself for loving it, that’s a whole different argument.
You’re not a “basic bitch” for enjoying the delicious high-fructose and milk-laden confection topped with whipped cream and pumpkin pie spice. You’re just a 20-something who knows what’s up. So go order that venti triple-shot Pumpkin Spice Latte and enjoy every sip of it.